Chapter 1:
The sun is shining and there are no clouds in the sky today. Jiang Xiao was admitted to the Happy Tree Private Hospital by himself in such good weather.
This is not like a hospital, but like a resort. The scenery is beautiful and the air is fresh. The ward for one person is beautiful, spacious and luxurious. You can have whatever you want. The doctors and nurses are very professional and their speeches are nice. If Jiang Xiao’s previous habits are followed, he must Give this private hospital a five-star praise, and write a rainbow fart of no less than 500 words to encourage it. Finally, I would like to express my thanks for the hospitality and come back next time.
It's a pity that this private hospital with very expensive service and good reputation does not have any rating app. If it wasn't for a friend's introduction, Jiang Xiao wouldn't be able to enter here with money. He probably won't be a repeat customer in his life. When I was in the hospital, I basically went out sideways.
Late stage leukemia, really unlucky.
Jiang Xiao was only 33 years old this year. When he got the results, he didn't believe it, but his physical illness was not based on his own will. He had to switch to several hospitals, and the results were the same.
He only has the second half left, at most.
The private hospital of Happiness Tree is indeed a good medical level, but Jiang Xiao's situation is basically impossible to save. He lives here, in addition to the last hope of surviving, it is more for the sake of a better life for himself in the last period of time, which is considered hospice care.
When he was not sick, he was always very busy, and he could not live without worry. In his twenties, relying on his youth, it was common for him to drink and stay up late when talking about business. And there were a lot of things going on some time ago, so I endured the physical discomfort and lack of energy, and never thought about it.
Dr. Liu, who was in charge of him, spoke very gently, told him some precautions in a soft voice, and finally said that if there is a visitor, just let him know in advance, and the hospital will pick him up specially.
"There won't be any visitors," Jiang Xiao said with a smile, "I've met my friends before I came here. For the last time, I want to be alone. If anyone asks me, just say I'm not here."
When he smiled politely, he showed a pair of small tiger teeth, because he had lost some weight during this time, the wrinkles at the corners of his eyes were not obvious, and his pale face was much younger.
Jiang Xiao has the kind of appearance that makes people feel good. Even during the period of talking, it can be seen that he has a good temper and mentality. Such a person should not be so lonely in the last period of his life.
Dr. Liu naturally understands, but at his age, he should have a family. Even if he doesn't mention his friends, his lover and children, shouldn't he come to see him?
But she had seen too many people and things, and she had some conjectures in her heart, but she didn't say anything.
The people living in the hospital are all rich people, and the rich people always have their own hardships that they don't want to talk about.
Happiness Tree is really a good hospital. Even if it can't save his life, it can do everything it can to reduce Jiang Xiao's pain. Only at this time can he be free and watch 20 episodes of soap operas slowly in the ward. Unfortunately, the hospital does not give him potato chips and crayfish, otherwise Jiang Xiao would be even happier.
The bed in the ward was very soft, and he fell asleep to the sound of the TV series.
Jiang Xiao was used to sleeping alone and didn't recognize the bed, and had a long, long dream at night, just like what happened a while ago.
That day, he just got the inspection report from the hospital. It just so happened that the Liujiang Industrial Park Management Committee held its annual meeting, and Jiang Xiao, who was always on time, was rarely late.
He was obviously a little distracted. When he entered the venue, he was asked for an invitation letter by the staff. His face was pale, and he smiled habitually.
"Sir, this is not an invitation letter," the young staff member had a good attitude, pouring a cup of hot water from the side and handing it over, "Look, this is a case book."
Jiang Xiao was stunned for a longer time this time. He took the case book back, and the logo of Liujiang First People's Hospital on it made his head hurt.
He turned over and over in the folder and couldn't find the invitation letter, but fortunately, someone came out of the venue. It happened to be a friend Jiang Xiao was familiar with. The factories of the two were very close, and they have known each other for more than ten years now.
"Where does President Jiang need an invitation letter? Are you new here? Why don't you know anyone?" The man greeted the staff and pulled Jiang Xiao up, "Why don't you call me if you can't get in? I?"
The meeting was halfway through. Jiang Xiao found a spot and sat at the back. The friend who brought him in was surnamed Su, and Jiang Xiao generally called him Boss Su.
Boss Su also saw that he was not in a good state, and asked, "You look so bad, have you quarreled with your family?"
Jiang Xiao shook his head.
"Don't be rude," Boss Su patted him on the shoulder. "My family doesn't agree with you selling the land in the industrial park directly, right?"
A factory in Jiang Xiao's hands has been in operation for more than ten years, producing daily necessities such as towels, wool slippers, and the factory has hundreds of workers. However, in recent years, the voice of industrial transformation in Liujiang City has become stronger and stronger. The location of this industrial park is very good. It is planned to be built as a high-tech industrial demonstration area. The factories inside should either conform to the policy transformation, or sell the factories and transfer to farther away.
Jiang Xiao's manufacturing plant is indeed a kind of low-end industry. He missed the opportunity for transformation. Now that the profits are getting lower and lower, and the expenses are getting higher and higher, it is also a fact that he can't support it day by day.
But the land for the factory belonged to Jiang Xiao. When he took over, the land was not worth much, so he bought it.
Boss Su didn't quite understand Jiang Xiao's behavior of selling land. This industrial park is a key project, and Jiang Xiao is not short of money. If he keeps it in his hands, he can collect millions in rent every year. Isn't it delicious?
Jiang Xiao listened to him, and squeezed the document bag tightly in his hand, which contained the test results he just got today.
"It's better to sell it, it's useless to keep it," Jiang Xiao said, "...I don't have much time."
The last words were spoken to him in a barely audible voice.
In fact, the previous procedures are almost the same. He came to cooperate with the final process today. The attitude of the other company and the garden committee is very good, and the money is very refreshing. The price of Jiang Xiao's sale is really not high, and the money is in hand. After that, he took out a large part and paid a lot of severance pay to the Bailai employees in the company.
The accountant in the factory, Sister Chen, has been working with Jiang Xiao all the time. She is now old and just took the money to go back to retirement. She is one of the few people who knows about Jiang Xiao's life. She cares more about Jiang Xiao than the factory's closure. this person.
"You've been looking really bad recently, have you been resting?" she said, "Why isn't Xiao Lin here for such a big thing?"
Jiang Xiao didn't answer, he's been in a daze a lot recently.
"He's not free." Jiang Xiao said slowly, "You know, he's busy and hasn't come back for more than a month."
"What kind of reason is this?" Sister Chen couldn't believe it, "He..."
Having said that, she shut up again, perhaps because Jiang Xiao's face was too haggard, and she couldn't say anything that would make him uncomfortable.
Sister Chen took the money and left, Jiang Xiao sat alone in the office for a long time, until it was late at night, and then slowly stood up and prepared to go home.
He didn't drive today. He walked back from the factory. The cold wind was like a knife in the dark night. Jiang Xiao walked through the crowd on the street. A new financial magazine was posted on the street kiosk. The cover was Lin Chengyu, who had not seen him for a long time. The upstarts in the financial circle seem to be easily liked by others. When Jiang Xiao passed by, he saw two young girls who bought the magazine with a grin.
Of course, it's easy to get Jiang Xiao's likes.
He stood in front of the newsstand for a while, Lin Chengyu on the cover was perfect, but Jiang Xiao was pale and disheveled, like a homeless wandering soul.
No one thought the two would be a couple.
Now he can still clearly recall the past. He met Lin Chengyu when he was nineteen years old. At that time, Jiang Xiao dropped out of school and went to work alone, struggling to make a living. He picked up a person in an alley.
At that time, Lin Chengyu had no father or mother, and he had no money on his body. I don't know why he was surrounded and beaten by a group of gangsters. Jiang Xiao went up to show his righteousness and acted bravely.
At that time, Lin Chengyu was all tattered and tattered as if he had come out of a garbage heap. He took it home and washed it, but it became a shining pearl. He was really good-looking, and the scars on his face did not damage his youthful beauty at all. Instead, he seemed more distressed.
He smiled at Jiang Xiao, like an attractive goblin or elf, so the young Jiang Xiao was heartbroken and fell in love at first sight.
After Jiang Xiao fell in love with someone, he suddenly had a purpose and hope in life. He willingly offered Lin Chengyu to let him go to university, but he was not willing to make him suffer a little bit. On the basis that he only had a junior high school diploma, he just started it. This factory, burning money to help him fight for a little chance in the unknown period, saw him enter the best investment bank, and then climbed up little by little to the position where he is now.
After thinking about this, Jiang Xiao realized that it had been so long.
He and Lin Chengyu met for fifteen years. At that time, he plucked up the courage to ask for love.
He used to think that he was a lucky person, had a successful career, was with the people he liked, and went from a hard life to a good life now.
Even if it feels hard sometimes, I always look forward to having time to enjoy the blessings of hard work with Lin Chengyu in the future. It's a pity that he waited to death, and he didn't wait for Lin Chengyu to have time, not to mention that he and Lin Chengyu fell in love with the same **** and could not get married. In the legal sense, he was just a stranger who had nothing to do with each other. For example, in the financial magazine just now, it was written that he was unmarried, single.
Jiang Xiao is now 33 years old. He missed too many opportunities to improve himself because of many things. Even though he has learned some experience in hard work, the limitations brought by his junior high school diploma cannot adapt to the current trend of high-tech reform. , the factory was sold, he had been Lin Chengyu's unsightly lover for ten years, and the hospital list told him that he had leukemia.
How did the day go so suddenly?
When he got the results of the examination, he was stunned. He immediately called Lin Chengyu. He called more than ten times, but no one answered. At night, it was his secretary who called Jiang Xiao back. Listen carefully, every sentence is thorny.
"Mr. Lin is in a meeting. There's a big order in the last few days, and the company is very busy," she said. "If you have anything to do, let me know in advance, and I'll make arrangements for you."
Jiang Xiao didn't have the strength to argue with Lin Chengyu's secretary again, and he didn't call him after that.
The illness was like the last straw. It overwhelmed Jiang Xiao. The collapse of the factory was a blow, and the blow of leukemia was even greater. Lin Chengyu was absent as always.
Jiang Xiao is a very enthusiastic person. He knows that Lin Chengyu has a cold temper, so it is natural for him to be cold in his relationship.
He was the one who fell in love first, and he fell deeply into it. He always felt that there was no problem with paying more. Jiang Xiao never thought about being with the person he liked.
Lin Chengyu is busy, and many normal couples have hardly enjoyed the date two people should have. In recent years, after Lin Chengyu's business focus has shifted from Liujiang to Binhai City, thousands of miles away, it has become even more difficult to gather less and leave more, but Jiang Xiao also endured it. .
Forbearance, if there is no such disease, maybe Jiang Xiao will continue to deceive himself like this. But with all these things, all of his pretences were broken all at once.
He was shaky, as if he had walked to the edge of a cliff.
Jiang Xiao didn't see Lin Chengyu go home until a week after he finished dealing with the factory.
He had known about leukemia for a long time at that time, and several close friends around him knew about it. One of them introduced Jiang Xiao to Xingfushu Private Hospital. Jiang Xiao went through the admission procedures alone, and he will be there the day after tomorrow. .
Probably the work at hand has come to an end, and Lin Chengyu will come back.
He was wearing a black suit, as if he had just come down from a banquet, stood at the entrance and pulled off his tie, then looked up at Jiang Xiao, just looking at his face made Jiang Xiao's heart move.
He is one year younger than Jiang Xiao. He is thirty-two years old this year. He is in the golden career period. He is of mixed race. His pupils are a little blue-gray, and his peach eyes are naturally attractive. His whole face is impeccable. Leaving the slightest trace on his face made him more mature and attractive.
Handsome and successful, if you live with such a person, you will be very happy, right?
Countless people thought like this, but Jiang Xiao, who actually accompanied him all the way and really experienced all this, had mixed feelings.
Lin Chengyu has been cold and thin for ten years, and no matter what he does, he can't warm his heart.
He had cooked a bowl of white porridge at night, but he couldn't eat it, so he pushed the bowl aside.
Lin Chengyu also looked a little tired. He sat on the sofa and opened a bottle of red wine first.
In the past, Jiang Xiao would sit next to him and naturally squeeze into his arms to find a topic. This time Jiang Xiao was abnormal. He took the bowl and went into the kitchen to clean up. Lin Chengyu waited for a while, and then looked at the kitchen suspiciously. A glance, but he didn't move.
But it was too silent, the atmosphere in the room was too strange, after a while, Lin Chengyu took the initiative to speak.
"Secretary Lin told you that you have made a lot of calls," he said. "I was in a meeting at the time, a very important meeting. If you have anything to do, just tell me now."
He felt that Jiang Xiao was a little unreasonable to be angry because of this incident. Maybe because he was in a good mood today, he took the time to explain it.
He only had to speak a little softer, and the light reflected on that face. Jiang Xiao used to never get angry because of this trivial matter, and was always the first to lose.
But today was different. Jiang Xiao came out after washing the dishes, turned his back to him, and responded lightly, "I see, it's nothing, the trivial matter has been resolved."
Secretary Lin is not born with yin and yang eccentricity. She has been doing this job for a long time, and she deeply felt that Lin Chengyu didn't take Jiang Xiao to heart, so she just watched the dishes and complained to Lin Chengyu about Secretary Lin's attitude, but it was just a pocket. Going back and forth and hitting the same wall again.
Jiang Xiao sat down on the sofa, but did not squeeze into Lin Chengyu's arms again.
"Have you been busy lately?" Then he asked softly, "I saw your magazine. There's a lot going on in the company, right?"
"It's okay," Lin Chengyu said with some energy when he mentioned the work at work, and poured wine into the glass, "The company has a big order, and I have to go on a business trip for a while. You should be happy for me."
Lin Chengyu has been enjoying a very good spring breeze recently, and he has no idea what torture Jiang Xiao has suffered during this time. He spends a lot of time away from home. Jiang Xiao should get used to it. He used to hear the news that he would be away from home for a long time. enjoy such enthusiasm.
But this time Jiang Xiao didn't show much expression. He lowered his eyes and asked, "When are you leaving?"
"Tomorrow morning."
After hearing Jiang Xiao's brief silence, he spoke again, with a trembling voice: "Can't you leave? You can't, take a moment...with me?"
Jiang Xiao didn't make such a request before. Even if he was reluctant, at most he expected Lin Chengyu to come back more often. If he couldn't come back, he would make a few more phone calls. He never asked Lin Chengyu to give up anything for himself.
He is one year older than Lin Chengyu, and Jiang Xiao is always taking care of him.
But in a few days, it will be the tenth anniversary of their official relationship. Lin Chengyu will know about the bankruptcy of the factory if he cares a little. Jiang Xiao's face is very bad. Boss Su and accountant Chen can see it at a glance, and they can ask more questions. A few words, but Lin Chengyu couldn't see it.
When Jiang Xiao said this, he tasted the smell of rust in his mouth and bleeding gums, which is one of the symptoms of leukemia.
"It doesn't take too long, a month, a week," he seemed to be trying to grab a life-saving straw, "or three days..."
He clearly wanted to talk to Lin Chengyu about this right away, telling the person he loves how badly he had been during this period of time. He couldn't see anyone, and he made a dozen calls, but there was no response. Even if Lin Chengyu felt that something was wrong at this time, Jiang Xiao opened his mouth and told him everything. After talking about these grievances, he might be able to live a little comfort in the last period of time.
But Lin Chengyu didn't nod, he didn't even ask why, just pulled Jiang Xiao closer, then interrupted him, pinched his earlobe, and asked, "Is Xiao Xiao still angry? ?"
Jiang Xiao shook his head stiffly, Lin Chengyu was very affectionate, because he was happy now, as if they were really a couple.
But if he really cares, how could he not know anything about these many things?
The tone of his words just now seemed to think that Jiang Xiao was joking.
I'm going to die, Lin Chengyu, you know?
He opened his mouth to say this, but Lin Chengyu opened his mouth at this moment, he kissed Jiang Xiao's lips, and then opened his mouth with a soft tone, but the meaning was obvious: "No, this matter is really important, Xiaoxiao, be obedient."
His arms wrapped around Jiang Xiao's waist intimately, and the words he spoke were like a knife that stabbed one's heart.
Jiang Xiao couldn't say anything.
At that moment, his eyes were stunned, sluggish, and his heart was ashes as he could not express.
He could not count how many times he had experienced such disappointment and compromise, but this time it was an expected disappointment. Maybe when it happened for the first time, he would argue, lose his temper, and beg, but this happened again and again, and Jiang Xiao had nothing to say.
He and Lin Chengyu have been together for such a long time, and it is impossible to say that there is no happiness. There is still a happy time between the two of them, and it is very rare.
But Jiang Xiao clearly realized time and time again that he was never the most important one in Lin Chengyu's heart. Partners, work, important parties, anyway, Jiang Xiao always has to wait in the back row, he has received countless times "no", "next time", "no time", "you have to be good", and then he goes from layer to layer. Looking for that little bit of happiness and happiness in the time when the layers have leaked, how cheap and ridiculous.
At this time, he would rather Lin Chengyu simply reject himself from the beginning to the end. From that time onwards, Jiang Xiao was tempted by the little sweetness to persevere. He felt that Lin Chengyu just didn't like to express, but it was different from his own personality. In the end, the abyss was all exposed, and he was in great pain.
If love does not have enough expressions and actions, it is not love at all, and Lin Chengyu never loves him.
Lin Chengyu didn't see these expressions, he drank some wine, and hoped that Jiang Xiao would be as obedient, active and enthusiastic as usual to please him.
In any case, the two of them have always been very harmonious and comfortable in bed-things.
Although it was a bit strange today, maybe it was because of the phone, but he still imagined the same as before, so he always used the previous method, dragged Jiang Xiao who was in a daze over, lowered his head and fed him a sip of wine.
The red wine was of a high degree. Jiang Xiao was stunned. After swallowing it, he remembered that he can't drink now, it's too hurtful.
"I do not want…"
Jiang Xiao refused. He was really uncomfortable today. He was hungry but couldn't eat anything, and he had no energy.
But Lin Chengyu wanted to do it, and never took his opinion seriously. He coaxed him intimately, but his actions could not be refused.
Neither of them slept that night. It was the most painful entanglement in Jiang Xiao's life, both physically and mentally.
He has always understood tolerance, thinking that he will cover the ice of Lin Chengyu for fifteen years. Lin Chengyu's heart has not warmed, Jiang Xiao's heart has cooled, he feels like a prop, dedicated to Lin Chengyu's life After paying, and finally being used up, I left the stage sadly.
The lover he thought was never his lover, and the marriage he asked for was also very inappropriate. A dream that lasted for fifteen years alone should be awakened. Little by little despair in his life accumulated, and it all exploded in the last days of his life.
"...Did you really love me?"
Jiang Xiao asked him during the process.
But I don't know if Lin Chengyu didn't hear it, didn't pay attention, or didn't want to answer this question at all, Jiang Xiao didn't get any answer.
In fact, Jiang Xiao himself knew in his heart that Lin Chengyu never knew what love was. Jiang Xiao paid too much, he was used to it and enjoyed it, but he would not really fall in love with him because of it.
Jiang Xiao's gums began to ooze blood again.
The next day, he watched Lin Chengyu packing his luggage, he was still very uncomfortable, his whole body hurt, but he was quiet and never said anything.
When Lin Chengyu was packing, Jiang Xiao was lying on the bed with his eyes open. If anyone looked at him at this time, he would definitely be frightened by his corpse-like expression.
Lin Chengyu finished packing up and was about to leave. He had done this kind of thing many times, leaving Jiang Xiao at home alone. He never felt anything. Anyway, for him, every time he came back, he would stay where he was. left.
But this time seems to be a little different. Lin Chengyu always feels an indescribable panic in his heart. He always feels that he is missing something, like a kind of warning and induction, as if there is something necessary in the luggage I didn't take it away. I checked it many times. He was always punctual, but now it's very abnormal if he hasn't left the house for an hour. The secretary over there has been urging him for a long time. .
When he closed the door, he saw Jiang Xiao got up in his pajamas, he stood there quietly, and then forced a smile to himself, revealing those two familiar and cute tiger teeth.
His smile was shallow, not as deep as his eyes. If he looked closely, he seemed to be crying.
Then the door closed, and Lin Chengyu was stunned for a while.
Jiang Xiao... He has lost some weight, Lin Chengyu thought, when I finish this job, I will have time to accompany him.
Besides, Jiang Xiao is the most obedient and sensible, he will understand.
He thought about these things in his heart, and in the end, as before, he habitually walked away without looking back.
When Jiang Xiao left, unlike Lin Chengyu with a big bag and a small bag, he brought his bank card, ID card and mobile phone, wrapped in an ordinary coat, and came to the Happy Tree Private Hospital like this.
Leaving the "home" where he and Lin Chengyu had lived for nearly ten years, Jiang Xiao seemed to have really cut something from himself, like gouging out a piece of meat.
Facts have proved that the money he has worked hard to earn is more reliable than that of Lin Chengyu. At least the high-charging Happy Tree Hospital did its best to make him less painful, and it did its best to make him look decent before he died. one-stop service.
Jiang Xiao lived in it, and his condition deteriorated quickly. Dr. Liu said that he had no sense of survival. He seemed to be exhausted and gave up naturally.
After Jiang Xiao came to the hospital, he received a lot of care, but the situation became worse and worse. His mobile phone number has not been changed, and the mobile phone is always on, but as long as he doesn't call, Lin Chengyu has always taken the initiative to call him, and it is the same now.
He has always been so high above, waiting for people to hold the sincerity in front of him.
Maybe people really have feelings in their hearts. One day, Jiang Xiao really felt that he was very bad. At that moment, his mind was in a mess, and he was not controlled by reason. Dr. Liu and a bunch of nurses surrounded him and played tricks on him. With all kinds of instruments and tubes, Jiang Xiao begged her in a daze and asked herself to make a phone call.
Dr. Liu couldn't resist, so he had to give him the phone.
She looked at Jiang Xiao, who was already blurred in front of her, trembling with her hands, trying her best to open her eyes wide to find the person's name on the screen of her mobile phone.
According to the time difference, it should be late at night. The phone rang for a long time, but no one answered. Jiang Xiao persevered and called, and finally someone answered.
It is a delicate female voice, and asked who are you?
Before Jiang Xiao could speak, he listened in a daze, asked a few questions over there, and hung up without a response.
After that call, the residual warmth in the ashes in his heart was drenched.
For the last time, there was no need to meet, Jiang Xiao threw away the phone and never called again.
At the end, when there was the last bit of rationality left, Dr. Liu was at the hospital bed and asked him what he wanted to engrave on the tombstone.
Jiang Xiao's parents were long gone, so was his so-called lover, his friends respected his choice, and he let him write the final epitaph. Many people's epitaphs want to talk about life and achievements in this life. Jiang Xiao didn't want to leave anything, but when he opened his mouth, he inexplicably thought of how he felt when he first entered the Xingfushu private hospital.
Dr. Liu had seen this man when he was the most uncomfortable, and he had also seen him laugh before he died. His eyebrows and eyes were curved, revealing two pointed little tiger teeth, just like when they first met, which made people involuntarily feel good.
He was finally buried in the beautiful cemetery. The location he chose was in the corner of the cemetery. He was alone and very quiet, which was in line with Jiang Xiao's idea. Thank you for your hospitality, I will come again next time.
The photo on the monument was also chosen by Jiang Xiao himself. It was when he was young, in his early twenties. He was brilliant and laughed like a morning glory, as if he had no worries in his life.
Jiang Xiao also liked to laugh when he was in the hospital. He was a very good-natured person, but compared with that photo, he always felt that his smile was very reluctant and not pure.
I don't know what made him like this.
Dr. Liu bought a bunch of daisies and placed them in front of his tomb. She had seen many patients, and she had a vague glimpse of Jiang Xiao's story, and she did not dare or want to think about it.
Many people are very hideous before they die, especially those in their thirties, who are in their prime, and it is normal to be unwilling. Jiang Xiao was too calm. He seemed to be too disappointed, so he was calm about everything.
If there is an afterlife, I wish him a better life.
The author has something to say: a new article has been opened, the manuscript is sufficient, and it will be updated every night and day.
In a half-empty modern society, attacking the previous life is really scum, Xiaoxiao reborn and walks the career line and talks to other boyfriends [not a joke, really talk, more than one], the ending does not change the attack, and it is too late to take this bite.