Chapter 468 Shadow
Wen Lan thought a lot on the way back to "Tinglan Mansion".
Although he knew that Xie Yansheng and He Zheng would have nothing to do, he still cared about He Zheng being able to sit in Xie Yansheng's office and have dinner face to face with Xie Yansheng.
If He Zheng were a man, she would not have these troubles, but He Zheng was not only a tall and beautiful woman, but also looked at Xie Yansheng with longing in her eyes.
Back at Tinglan Mansion, Wen Lan only hugged Nuan Nuan for a while before going upstairs alone, shut himself in the master bedroom and began to reflect.
She closed the curtains, lay on the bed and told herself over and over again that Xie Yansheng and He Zheng only had a working relationship, and eating together was a coincidence, a coincidence——
But she tried many times, and every time when she was about to reconcile the matter, she would think of He Zheng's sticky eyes when she looked at Xie Yansheng.
In fact, she knows that she is not a petty person, and the reason why she is so fussy now is because of her deep self-esteem!
Her inferiority complex was caused by Jiang Jingci and Wen Jinyin, who destroyed the high-spirited Wen Lan in the past.
When Xie Yansheng came back, she quietly looked at the time, it was three-thirty in the afternoon.
She had no desire to communicate with Xie Yansheng and lay on her side pretending to sleep.
Xie Yansheng stood at the door and stared at her slender back in silence for a while, then took the initiative to say: "Get up and pack your luggage. Let's go back to Jiangcheng to get the marriage certificate."
She immediately lost her composure and sat up from the bed, "Didn't you agree that you would consider getting the certificate after one year? What do you mean by this now?"
"It's not interesting, I just want to make you feel at ease." Xie Yansheng walked towards her, his eyes focused deeply on her, "When you become a real Mrs. Xie, maybe you won't have random thoughts anymore."
"The random thoughts are not because of that piece of paper." She lifted the quilt and got out of bed, "If your heart is not with me, even if you get the certificate, it will be a piece of useless paper to me."
"You complained that I didn't say who you were in front of He Zheng. Tell me, how should I say it appropriately! Are you my ex-wife, my current girlfriend, or the mother of my child?" Xie Yan said in a clear voice. His face was slightly stunned.
"But you didn't say anything. You didn't even think of introducing me to He Zheng." She tried to control her emotions and kept her tone as calm as possible.
"Because I haven't found an appropriate title for you yet." Xie Yansheng bent down to open the safe and took out the ID card and household registration book. "After receiving the ID card, all these unpleasantness should disappear."
Her internal organs felt like a handful of sharp wheat chaff had been stuffed into her, and she was miserable.
What she cares about is not the marriage certificate, but Xie Yansheng's heart!
Seeing her silence, Xie Yansheng urged: "Pack up your things and rush there now. Maybe you can catch the last train from Jiangcheng Civil Affairs Bureau."
"Let's talk about it in a year." She murmured with her eyes lowered. "Perhaps in less than half a year, you and I will go our separate ways. It will be too troublesome to apply for a divorce certificate by then, so it's better not to get the certificate first."
Xie Yansheng almost had a heart attack when she heard it, and pressed her against the wall with a sullen face, "Are you so dismissive of our relationship?"
She looked calm and her eyes were dull, "Just tell the truth."
"What you said is like stabbing me in the heart." Xie Yansheng gently rubbed her cheek with his hand and said warmly, "You have been very hostile to me since last night."
"No!" she retorted.
"Don't rush to argue with me yet." Xie Yansheng held her hand, pushed her to the bed and sat down, lowering his voice, "First tell me why you rejected me last night, huh?"
"..."
She was speechless.
"Let me tell you, it's because you have a psychological shadow and are still brooding about that incident. Now you don't want to have any physical contact with me." In order to completely dispel her worries, Xie Yansheng chose to tear her apart again. Open her wounds.
She bit her lip hard, not daring to look into Xie Yansheng's eyes.
"The matter is over. You not only have me but Nuan Nuan. To wallow in pain any longer is tantamount to trapping yourself." Xie Yansheng held up her face and forced her to look at him, "Actually, after the accident, I am better than you. It’s a hundred times more painful. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have picked up Jiang Jingci before boarding the plane.”
Xie Yansheng's words did not help her get out of her trough, but made her dislike herself even more.
The filth on her body still brought pain and humiliation to Xie Yansheng!
She could not forgive herself, and she only felt deep self-blame and guilt for Xie Yansheng.
"My body is already dirty, don't have any illusions about me anymore, I will never be Mrs. I went downstairs in anger with you. If I didn’t go downstairs, I wouldn’t have been taken advantage of by Wen Jinyin, let alone violated by Jiang Jingci! Please, don’t be so nice to me—"
"It's meaningless to talk about whose fault it is now." Xie Yansheng was afraid that she would break away and run away, so he held her arm tightly, "For that matter, I almost took out my heart and showed it to you. What else do you want from me?”
"Thank you for the banquet -" she cried out the man's name, "I have tried very hard to let myself accept all this, but I really can't do it now! I can't accept that I was - please Give me a little more time to calm down—"
"What else do you want?" Xie Yansheng asked anxiously when he realized that he couldn't get into her heart.
"For now - don't sleep in the same room anymore." She clarified her attitude in a low voice, "Maybe after a while, I will be able to come out of the shadows."
Xie Yansheng let her go in disappointment and said in a low voice: "Distance cannot create beauty, it can only create barriers."
"I just want to be alone and quiet." At this moment, her tone was humble to the dust, "If I face you at night, I'm afraid I will go crazy."
Xie Yansheng looked at her with a look of heartache, and said "OK" without thinking.
A quarrel full of gunpowder finally turned into calm.
The two fell into silence again.
"I'll go back to the company first, remember to call me if you have anything." Xie Yansheng said and went downstairs.
Listening to the footsteps going away on the stairs, Wen Lan's tears fell.
It's obvious that her happy life with Xie Yansheng has begun, but it has become like this!
Every time she faces Xie Yansheng, she not only feels dirty, but also very humble.
This kind of humility has never happened since she met Xie Yansheng.
It seems that now she can be with Nuannuan and live in the big house of "Tinglan Mansion" all thanks to Xie Yansheng.
Xie Yansheng came back in the middle of the night again, and knocked on her door when he went upstairs.
At first she didn't open the door, but the knocks got louder and louder, so she had to bite the bullet and open the door.
"Lanlan, I'm drunk." Xie Yansheng stumbled over.
She hurriedly supported Xie Yansheng.
"All the men at the table have wives calling to urge them to go home, but you didn't even call me!" As soon as Xie Yansheng finished complaining, the phone in his jacket pocket rang.
Wen Lan reached out to help him take it out, and saw the name "He Zheng" flashing on the screen.