Chapter 163:
Jiang Xiao's photo was not limited to this one, he quickly found another one. But this Jiang Xiao's smile is a little shallower, without that big laugh, it looks alive and energetic, but Lin Chengyu still cherishes it.
He didn't know what to do this time, and he was afraid that, like last time, he would hold it too tightly and it would disappear when he woke up, but he wanted to see it again, because he was afraid that he would lose sight of it and lose it.
It was just a photo that made him panic for a while.
Jiang Xiao saw that he was hiding in the corner and peeking at the photo, and his stroking was lighter than before, as if he was afraid of scaring the people inside. His fingers slowly brushed the face that made people mad, every photo of Jiang Xiao was smiling, with bright eyes, cute and vibrant.
He stared and touched the bright eyes on the piece of paper again. For some reason, he didn't dare to stick the photo to himself. He only dared to grab a handful in the void on the photo with his touched hand, and then Put it in your heart.
His nights can only be seen on pieces of paper in the future.
He is in very bad shape.
Jiang Xiao thought, from spirit to body.
He saw Lin Chengyu lose weight little by little, and when he finally saw him, he was still in high spirits and boasted that he had turned all living beings upside down.
Lin Chengyu remembered the photo that was blown away by the wind for a long time. One day Jiang Xiao watched him finish cleaning the house, taking care of the flowers and plants, and then stood blankly in the living room for a while.
He heard a little rain outside.
Lin Chengyu seemed to think of something, took out an umbrella from the cabinet, tidied up a little, and then went out.
He seldom goes out, just as he seldom came home before.
He walked in the direction of Jiang Xiaochangzi, which was wrong, it was the former factory.
The company that bought the piece was fast, a new building was erected, and it was already in use. After all, several years have passed. The place is quite close by car, about 20 minutes, but it takes two or three hours to walk.
Lin Chengyu walked through the crowd with an umbrella. He seldom walked such a long way, and he was not used to the crowd and the light outside.
The renovation of the old industrial park was very successful. Most of the labor-intensive small factories were moved out, the gates were changed, the roads were widened, and a bunch of new greenery was built, which Jiang Xiao couldn’t even recognize.
Wow, this is actually his land.
Lin Chengyu couldn't recognize it either.
The scene in front of him was so different from the one in the photo of Jiang Xiao he lost. He stayed there for a long time, spent a while, but couldn't find the factory in his memory. Even the layout had changed. He couldn't tell which one was the original. It belongs to Jiang Xiao, and even Jiang Xiao himself has been able to distinguish it for a while.
He turned around in a daze, and could only stand back to the gate of the industrial park. Although this place has also been remodeled, he can still vaguely see the shadow of the past.
It was off-duty time. Cars and people passed by in large numbers at the gate of the park. He carefully identified them one by one, but he did not find Jiang Xiao's shadow inside.
Seeing that there were fewer and fewer people, the security guard at the gate looked at the man. He was dressed well, but the unshaven man looked weird.
"Oh," he called Lin Chengyu, "what are you doing?"
After calling Lin Chengyu a few times, he responded.
"I'm here to pick up someone," he said. "My lover works here. It's raining today. I want to pick him up."
The security said "oh".
I've been waiting here for two hours, and I haven't seen anyone waiting for him. It's probably a quarrel, and my wife is angry.
"Just make a phone call," the security guard pointed at him, "ask if you are working overtime. Don't wait here on rainy days."
I held an umbrella in my hand and didn't hold it up. Although it didn't rain much in the rainy season, it was still enough to be drenched for so long.
The warm-hearted security guard watched him slowly take out his mobile phone to make a call.
The number of Jiang Xiao, Lin Chengyu, has been paying the bills without stopping, but it must be turned off.
"Hello, the phone you dialed has been switched off, please wait..."
This beep is the most frequent sound Lin Chengyu has heard during this period of time. He knows in his heart that it is impossible to get through, but every time he presses the dial button with his trembling fingers, he has a tiny expectation, and then it is broken again and again. .
Every day, there are countless facts reminding him that Jiang Xiao is no longer there.
"Can't get through?" The security guard shook his head, thinking that it must have made his wife angry, "Go home and kneel on the washboard."
Jiang Xiao, who was happily strolling around in the park, came back and heard this sentence as soon as he arrived.
I am no longer his wife, Jiang Xiao retorted, and he is very reasonable, never letting people kneel on the washboard.
Lin Chengyu lowered his head, thinking that it would be good to kneel on a washboard before.
Now he won't come back even if he kneels down on Jiang Xiao. He couldn't find the old factory that had been demolished, and naturally he couldn't wait here for Jiang Xiao, who had passed away.
Jiang Xiao didn't stay there for a long time, and floated home by himself. Lin Chengyu came back very late, and of course he walked back.
No one was picked up, but when he got home, he found the TV was on.
After touching the photo last time, Jiang Xiao found that he occasionally had a little ability to touch other things, even if it was light, he couldn't do anything, he could do small things, for example, turn on the TV.
He hasn't watched a lot of soap operas yet, even watching the news is quite interesting.
Anyway, don't blow your hair outside, if Lin Chengyu wants to blow it, just blow it yourself.
"...Xiaoxiao?"
He cautiously made a sound, but still no one responded.
Lin Chengyu was at a loss, he walked over slowly and sat on the other side of the sofa, while cartoons were playing on the TV.
He didn't say anything else, but for the next few days, he remembered to turn on the TV at home and pick an interesting channel to turn on.
"Xiaoxiao," he sometimes still couldn't help but secretly ask, "is that you?"
He didn't wait for Jiang Xiao to answer, but the illness came. He was outside in the rain for a long time, and he came back with a low fever, but Lin Chengyu didn't plan to rest in bed, and he didn't dare to turn off the TV, so he sat quietly on the other side of the sofa.
A few days later, his partner brought him antipyretics and a psychiatrist.
Lin Chengyu is the chairman of the company, and he quit when the company was at its peak, which is indeed a major event in the circle.
Before and Jiang Xiao were not public, but now everyone knows that President Lin is crazy for a man who died of illness and wants nothing. Until now, it has been two or three years and he has not appeared in public.
He doesn't care about the company, but every day he looks like he's going to die, and he is dedicated to torturing himself. The doctor still needs to see it. Lin Chengyu has been to Xingfushu Hospital before, but he didn't go there after that. This time, the psychiatrist is looking for another person.
He also refused to leave the house, so the partner brought the doctor to the door, and when he arrived, he found that he was turning on the TV with cartoons playing in it.
"You like watching this now?"
"No," Lin Chengyu shook his head, his eyes showed a little tenderness, "Xiaoxiao may like it."
The partner and the psychiatrist looked at each other, and the meaning was obvious. This person designated that his spirit was somewhat abnormal.
But after the test, the results were surprising. During Lin Chengyu's conversation with outsiders, even if the professional doctor used some method, he changed his way of speaking, and the whole person was too calm.
"...Look, I'm not sick," Lin Chengyu said, "I'm very awake, and I know what I'm doing now."
He gradually learned that the first year of Jiang Xiao's death was indeed affected, and his mind was chaotic like a mess. At that time, he lived in the Happy Tree Hospital, and madness was also a relief for him, otherwise he really couldn't stand such a blow.
But knowing everything, and then finding Jiang Xiao's tomb, he became more and more sober. The doctor of Happiness Tree has prescribed medicine, and he took it for a while until it was no problem.
If he is really crazy and his mind is confused, it is also an escape. Lin Chengyu doesn't want to escape anymore, he wants to experience all this clearly by himself.
He's just sober and crazy.
Even if the TV is suddenly turned on, without his partner saying it, rationality can make him think that some TVs will indeed turn on by themselves if they are in poor contact.
"Jiang Xiao has already left," he said. "I know very well what I did and what the situation is now... But sometimes I can't help but think, if only Jiang Xiao was still alive."
Jiang Xiaoren is so good, and he has never done anything wrong. He thought many times that it would be fine if he died.
Jiang Xiao lived a good life, and wouldn't be sad for such a **** as himself. It's great, but things don't always go according to people's wishes.
Today's so-called psychiatrist is not the key point for Lin Chengyu. The company's affairs must be dealt with. He wants to sell all the shares in his hand to his partners at a low price, and then he will be quiet in the future, and he will also give others an explanation.
In order to prove to him that he was really sober and not talking nonsense, he flipped through the company's annual reports last year and the year before. Even if he had never been to the company in the past two years, he could still give an overview of the company's future development, and even Can give pointers.
"You're a really good businessman."
The other party sighed.
"I'd rather not," said Lin Chengyu, who also pushed aside the antipyretic medicine sent by the other party. "You took away the shares, so don't come to me in the future. Thank you, I want to be alone."
The cartoon on the TV was still playing, Jiang Xiao was really watching it, and he also heard the movement over there.
Lin Chengyu is actually not sick. He was surprised to hear this, and he didn't know what to say.
Few people came to him after that.
Lin Chengyu was quiet in the house most of the time. Jiang Xiao's soulful state was an indescribable feeling. He was just a bystander, and sometimes it felt like a dream, and the illusion was very strong.
People don't feel boring in their dreams, but everything they see is so clear.
Lin Chengyu would go out later and remember things. Every time he goes out, he writes a paragraph in the notebook, and it can't be called a diary, just like the cookbook Jiang Xiao left behind, he is writing his own feelings.
He has been to the place where he once stayed with Jiang Xiao, and survived by missing Jiang Xiao.
Jiang Xiao looked at the notebook.
Instead, he saw a very different self in Lin Chengyu's eyes.
"...The first time I saw Jiang Xiao, in that small rental house. He rescued me last night, but I couldn't see his face clearly, and I thought to myself how could there be such a stupid so-called kind person in this place.
It was only the next day that I finally saw people clearly. Jiang Xiao's eyes were so round, they looked even more round when they got bigger. He wanted to leave, but he opened his mouth and said that I could stay, but I couldn't even say a 'no'. Come. "
"He's so cute."
"How can there be people who are full of energy every day?"
"Jiang Xiao is really the most powerful and capable person. He seems to be able to achieve whatever goals he sets. I am very proud of him."
"On the day he confessed, I have never experienced such joy, and I have to pretend that I am not so excited and deceive myself."
"After I was with Jiang Xiao, I was very happy every day, the happiness that made people jealous, but I didn't realize it at that time."
"I often think now, when did I fall in love with Jiang Xiao? It's hard to tell, but I did love him for a long time. In retrospect, the first time I saw him, this person was very different. "
"It's all my fault. Song He is right. He is such a powerful and good person. If it wasn't for me, I don't know how good I would have been. I was an extremely lucky person who could make the best Jiang Xiao love me for a while. , it seems that the sun is finally willing to shine on me. If such luck is lost, I will be nothing."
However, this life has an end.
His long-term sleep and diet are irregular, and his mentality is also very bad. Anyone's body always has a limit, and if you go on like this, even if you don't commit suicide, you won't be able to live for long.